Saturday, May 12, 2012

A Mother's Day Wish

     
     Mom knows as well as anybody, what are without a doubt my two biggest passions. One, of course, is basketball.  Ever since I was six years old, not a day has gone by where I wasn't either playing basketball, watching basketball, coaching basketball, or thinking basketball.  As a kid, I'd willingly shovel the driveway during the winter, not for Dad, not our driveway, but the driveway next door, because they had a basketball hoop where I could shoot when I was finished.  Though my childhood NBA dreams faded quickly, I still played through high school, and later became a Park & Rec, and then a high school coach.
     Through it all, Mom was there every step of the way.  Driving me to practice and to games for twelve years.  Cheering for me when I led my 3rd grade T-Bird team averaging 4 points per game, up to when I was lucky getting 4 minutes of playing time per game on the high school varsity.  Dad was there supporting me as well, but in a different way:  In an analytical, constructive way--in a way where I use that perspective as a coach today.  But Mom, she was my stability, the one I could always count on as my number one fan, whether it was with a ride when I needed one or by collecting write-ups from the sports page when my name was in it. Or by not making an issue over my late night drunkenness the night I quit the varsity team my senior year, when under any other circumstance I would have been severely punished and grounded "indefinitely".  At 46 now, nothing has changed.  She's still my #1 fan, even if she doesn't like me as much now that I'm a loud and temperamental coach, and not that quiet and shy six year playing Biddy Basketball.  
      
      Ever since I first saw Bruce Springsteen's video, "Brilliant Disguise", and later confiscated my sister Linda's Springsteen Live '75-'85 album when I was 21, my second passion began. I became hooked on Bruce's music.  Obsessively hooked on it in a way that really, only fellow Springsteen fans can understand.  To explain to a non-fan, or a casual fan, the emotional depth and personal influence of his music and storytelling, is like explaining to a Yankee fan how awesome the 2004 season felt to a multi-generational Red Sox fan.  It's beyond words; it's just an indescribable myriad of feelings that stirs the heart, mind, and soul when entering the world of Springsteen songs.

        Since he was a teenager, Bruce has written a bunch of songs that were either directly about his father, or were influenced by his father.  Some showed him in a positive light, others not so much.  It was easy for him, Bruce would say, writing about his father, because that's where a lot of what you learn about life, as a son, comes from, for better or worse.  As a son, your dad is your biggest influence.  Moms, on the other hand, not so much.  Not as much anyway.  Moms are the stabilizing force behind the family unit.  The ones that often do the most in making the family feel secure; feel loved.  They're the real backbone that keeps the family together, and are often taken for granted and under appreciated for everything they do.
               
         Several years back, Bruce wrote his first and only song about his mother.  "Probably the most autobiographical song I've ever written" he would say. The Wish starts out describing a young boy admiring a guitar through a music store window with his mother by his side.  Next, the singer sings: "That night on top of that Christmas tree shines one beautiful star / And lying underneath, a brand new Japanese guitar".  (In my analytical opinion) Bruce uses the star of Bethlehem as a metaphor for the gift of the guitar underneath his Christmas tree.  As the star of Bethlehem symbolized the birth of Jesus, and the rebirth of mankind 2000 years ago, the star above his new guitar, his "wish", symbolizes the birth of his music career.  Later he sings: "And it's a funny old world, Ma, where a little boy's wishes come true".

Bruce and mom Adele  
        When I first heard this song, I of course heard Bruce tell the story of him and his mom and pictured the whole scene, with Bruce as a boy and his mom Adele standing right there outside that music store.  But I also personalized it for myself, and every time I hear it, it brings to mind the wish my mom gave to me.  It was December, 1972, and against my will and vehement protests, (my best friend didn't have to go), Mom took me down to the old high school and signed me up to play Biddy Basketball.  I was so mad at her!  I think I pouted that whole first day.  But whatever her reason was, whether it was to get me away from a houseful of girls, get me involved in sports or with a whole new group of boys, I don't know.  But after it took me a couple of weeks to get used to playing Biddy Basketball, it became the love of my life.  I didn't know it at the time, and I'm sure Mom didn't either, but that was my "wish" come true--Mom introducing me to basketball.

      
      In the song, Bruce sings of wanting to repay his Ma with a wish of her own.  He sings: "It ain't no phone call on Sunday, flowers, or a Mother's Day card,..(or) a house on the hill".  My gift to my mom on Mother's Day isn't any one of these things either--definitely not a new house on the hill (sorry about that, Mom).  Bruce's gift turns out to be this song he wrote to his mother.  My mom definitely knows that I can't sing, and outside of an essay hear or there, knows I'm not much of a writer, certainly not a song writer. But my gift to my mom on Mother's Day is just letting her know that I have always appreciated, more than she knows, her making me go to basketball when I was six years old.  Now, unlike Springsteen says in the song about "what that guitar bought us", my basketball career has bought us absolutely no financial reward at all.  Nothing--nada--zilch!  But what basketball has brought me ("the other things it's brought")--life lessons of integrity, discipline, character, competition, and the friendships of hundreds of other players and coaches, is priceless to me.  And it's because of what Mom did forty years ago. 
       
     Bruce had his influences:  Elvis, The Beatles, Bob Dylan.  I've had my own:  Rick Barry, Steve Alford, Bob Knight.  But both of us would have never gotten started doing what we love to do most, if not for our moms.  Thanks, Mom, and Happy Mother's Day. 

THE WISH  By Bruce Springsteen
Dirty old street all slushed up in the rain and snow
Little boy and his ma shivering outside a rundown music store window
That night on top of a Christmas tree shines one beautiful star
And lying underneath a brand-new Japanese guitar

I remember in the morning, ma, hearing your alarm clock ring
I'd lie in bed and listen to you gettin' ready for work
The sound of your makeup case on the sink
And the ladies at the office, all lipstick, perfume and rustlin' skirts
And how proud and happy you always looked walking home from work

If pa's eyes were windows into a world so deadly and true
You couldn't stop me from looking but you kept me from crawlin' through
And if it's a funny old world, mama, where a little boy's wishes come true
Well I got a few in my pocket and a special one just for you

It ain't no phone call on Sunday, flowers or a mother's day card
It ain't no house on a hill with a garden and a nice little yard
I got my hot rod down on Bond Street, I'm older but you'll know me in a glance
We'll find us a little rock 'n roll bar and baby we'll go out and dance

Well it was me in my Beatle boots, you in pink curlers and matador pants
Pullin' me up of the couch to do the twist for my uncles and aunts
Well I found a girl of my own now, ma, I popped the question on your birthday
She stood waiting on the front porch while you were telling me to get out there
And say what it was that I had to say

Last night we all sat around laughing at the things that guitar brought us
And I layed awake thinking 'bout the other things it's brought us
Well tonight I'm takin's requests here in the kitchen
This one's for you, ma, let me come right out and say it
It's overdue, but baby, if you're looking for a sad song, well I ain't gonna play it





1 comment:

  1. Awesome tribute to your dear Mother, John

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